Everything about them has always freaked me out.
Going to the eye doctor was always like stepping into a haunted house...
all those pictures of the inner-workings of your eyes...freaking.
Growing up many kids have fears of monsters lurking in the closet or hiding under the bed.
Those monsters were probably hairy and scary,
not mine.
My biggest monster was a big, shiny, scary eyeball...with legs.
It would chase me around with it's huge blinking eye yelling, "I see you! I see YOU!"
Simply terrifying.
In high school I had the best job.
I worked for a Veterinary Hospital...I played with puppies and kittens.
While there, one of the doctors learned vividly about my fear of eyes.
While helping with a surgery removing a tumor, we were talking about things that could be found in tumors...from teeth to, get this, the forming of an eye. EEK!
That solidified my fear.
But, it didn't stop there.
My favorite doctor to work with, Dr. Q took my fear a little further.
While I was a lunch he created a fake eyeball tumor...with suture eyelashes and everything...
and placed it somewhere so that I would find it.
Well, it worked, I was completing freaked out!
Needless to say, anything to do with the eyes, terrified me.
For years, I had convinced myself that I was too scared to have Lasik.
And I came up with every excuse in the book.
Plus, wearing glasses and contacts wasn't so bad anyway....
At least that's how I used to feel.
Until two years ago when my contacts weren't so comfortable anymore.
It's as if my eyes were rejecting them.
I guess after wearing them for 23 years, it wasn't so surprising.
So I had a choice...Either wear glasses for the rest of my life, or face my fears.
I chose to face my fears.
If you are in the same place that I was, scared, I totally get it.
But believe me, if I can have the surgery, than anyone can.
So what were my fears?
1. I'll blink in the middle of the laser cutting.
Ok, there is NO WAY that you can blink! None at all. Keep in mind that your eyes are numb and you can't feel anything...you can only feel the coolness from the solution that he uses to keep your eye lubricated. You can't blink..they have taped your eye open and there is a device that is holding your eye open as well. But you can't feel it! You can't at all! Dr. Waldman talked me through every step, so I knew exactly what was happening. Really, you can't blink.
2. Wait, I have to be awake?! Why can't they just knock me out?!
This one really freaked me out! Anything to do with the eye already freaks me out, and now I have to be awake for someone slicing into it?! Seriously? While you are awake during the procedure, you have been given a relaxer to help take some of the edge off your nerves. Believe me it helps...a lot. I felt me relaxed, but fully able to understand and follow directions. The reason they can't knock you out is because they need your eye to have "active eye movement." It sounds creepy, but it's just so that the laser can accurately track your eye. Your job the entire time is to stare at the blinking light. Needless to say, me and the blinking light became best friends. I loved that blinking light, and stared at it like it was the most interesting thing I had ever seen. And it was interesting because I can see.
Though being awake was scary before the procedure, it was calming to know exactly what was happening. Plus, in my experience with Dr. Waldman and staff, they were extremely comforting and kept my nerves under control.
3. I'll move and the laser will slice my face apart!
This isn't the movies, but I really had pictured the machine going out of control and leaving me missing half of my face. I know. Ridiculous. And it really is. The laser only activates when it has everything lined up AND your surgeon initiates it. If your eye moves at all, the laser shut down. In actuality, the laser is only working, cutting, for 30 seconds, and again, you're just staring at a blinking light. It would be impossible to have it slice my face off.
I'll have it done, but it won't actually work...I'll still won't have good eye-sight.
Yes, there is that chance, but to me it was worth it. Also, I knew that Dr. Waldman would only perform the surgery if he was confident that the outcome would be close to 20/20 vision in the end. And close to 20/20 is WAY, WAY better than what I had ever seen in my life. So I figured, "Cool!"
4. I'll actually be blind!
Again, small chance of this happening...and really it would be because of a genetic issue and not because of the surgery. But, they have to tell you all of the statistics, even the small ones. Of course, I was ok with this, to a certain degree because I had always wanted a seeing eye dog. I know. Weird, but totally true. The reality was that I felt completely confident in Dr. Waldman. He was extremely detailed and even double-checked the numbers the night before the surgery...I liked that. I knew that every angle was being evaluated...I really liked that.
5. It will be too painful.
5. It will be too painful.
Is there pain? Yes. Unbearable? No, it's bearable. To me it felt like getting soap in my eyes...but it lasted for a few hours. The good part was that I slept through most of it and that when I woke up, about 4 hours later, I could see perfectly and the pain was gone. It was amazing!
Dr. Waldman and all of the staff at EyeHealth Northwest were so supportive. This was fantastic experience and I would do it again in a heartbeat. If you are even contemplating having the surgery, you should do it. It will literally change your life. Guaranteed.
Dr. Waldman and all of the staff at EyeHealth Northwest were so supportive. This was fantastic experience and I would do it again in a heartbeat. If you are even contemplating having the surgery, you should do it. It will literally change your life. Guaranteed.
